This girl is more easily done than said...
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
