Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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