You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
