I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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