Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize