That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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