You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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