Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
