i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
