he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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