i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
