OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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