We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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