At least make sure they are 18
Why
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize