it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize
