laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize