so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
