thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
