Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
You're like the curious george of whores
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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