For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
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