so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
