I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize