2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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