Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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