This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Randomize
