What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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