I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
