Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
