So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
