guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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