Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
