Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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