return my video game
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
