ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
