Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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