There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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