He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
