Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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