a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Randomize
