I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
