you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize
