took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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