We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
