Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
North Korea, Best Korea!
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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