his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
