Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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