Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
