the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize