would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize