I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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