I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
