i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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